I used to be afraid of heights.
Lived in this bungalow for 17 years and never once saw the roof. Today, as the contractors went up to check on the roof for root causes of leakage ( punnily, it was caused by the roots of trees growing up in my roof) , I decided to climb up with them to check it out for myself. I shocked them as much as I shocked me with that spur-of-the-moment decision.
At such a height, it was dizzying. The wind kept making me feel unsteady and the tiles were burning hot. And at some point I felt nauseous just thinking of how I am going to turn around and climb down that ladder. Which was perched between two rooftops.
I imagined everything. Me slipping on the overgrown moss and falling down and getting spiked at the gate like I have seen in movies.
I thought the wind would throw me off to my neighbours house like a horror stricken Mary Poppins without her umbrella.
For a brief moment I imagined spending the rest of my life up on my roof because I wouldn’t have the courage to climb down the ladder.
Or that I would fall and crash through the second tier of tiles and land on my dining table with a broken back. Again, like in the movies.
The mind can be so creative. So easily negative. And so limiting.
Deep breath.
I made a choice.
I laughed it off and started to live in the moment - enjoying the lovely breeze, feeling on top of the world, that wonderful warm feeling of the sun under my feet….
I looked at my house with a whole new perspective - that I am reigning over my castle like a Queen overlooking the parapets into a whole new level of scenery never seen before.
The rooftop experience. It gave me perspective.
That life is about conquering your fears. Step by step.
Or rung by rung , as I hugged the wall and gingerly went down the ladder.
Its the fear that kills us most often. We attract what we put out.
